Introduction

As the title says, this blog is my attempt to chronicle my fumblings toward religion. I have always felt something missing, spiritually, in my life, but none of the religions I investigated (and I investigated an awful lot of them) really resonated with me particularly well.

The one that came closest was Wicca. So what was wrong with Wicca?  Well, let me start off with what was right (for me) about Wicca.  I love that it is a nature religion.  Growing up in rural areas as I did, I feel a lot of communion and identification with nature.  So right off the bat, I was sympathetic to Wicca when I started reading about it.  I like that it is experiential. I like that it is non-dualistic.  I like that it is pantheistic.  I don't mind that it is a new (or new-old) religion -- I think all religions must stay new if they are to be relevant.  I like that it focuses on this life, not the afterlife. In short, I like a lot about Wicca, and I think I naturally fall somewhere in the Neo-Pagan spectrum of beliefs.  I may even be some sort of Eclectic Wiccan.  I don't know just yet.  This blog is intended at least in part as a tool to help me find out.  One of the series of posts I have planned is an analysis of what I believe about the Wiccan Rede and other creeds and guidelines.

So why am I not (or at least not sure I am) a Wiccan?  Well, the magic trips me up.  It strikes me that if magic is real, it requires some kind of belief in order to see it, and I don't have the right kind of belief.  My kind of magic manifests in things like the color of the clouds at sunset, and the miracle in the spiral of an ammonite.  It doesn't require ritual implements.  In fact, I think I'd feel silly holding a ritual implement.  If you don't, that is wonderful  - for you.  But for me it is an act of basic respect, both to myself and to the religion, not to engage in important things with my tongue in my cheek.  To put it in the language of the new atheists, there is just too much woo in Wicca for me.  Granted, I wouldn't go so far as that blog.  I know that every religion cloaks itself in metaphor, and I am prepared to accept Wicca's mythos on its own terms.  And I believe mythos is important -- it provides a metaphorical way to grasp things that would otherwise be hard to hold onto.

What I'm looking to create is a framework for expressing and nurturing my spirituality in a way that seems both accurate and honest to me. I have a few ideas, but I don't know what shape that is going to take.  This blog was conceived as a place for me to chronicle my thoughts and to (hopefully) get feedback from any generous others who are willing to share what they think with me.